Posts under Tag: Kids
What Kind of an Idiot Thinks This is Okay?

Ahhh…it’s that time of year again. Time for witches and ghosts and goblins and of course, the trashy, slutty costumes for little girls that make my blood boil. But…I’ve railed about those plenty in the past. Everyone who gets mail probably already knows of a certain national party store chain that carries an assortment of inappropriate costumes for elementary aged […]

By with 55 comments
And You’re Not Invited

Do you remember the first time you found out YOU weren’t invited to a party but all your friends were? (And I’m not talking about that revival thing that was being sent around on Facebook by an old (and very saved) friend. I wouldn’t go to that anyway—you see, God and I have an understanding… He doesn’t nag or guilt […]

By with 31 comments
Mean Girls Suck

Every summer my daughter goes to day camp. She absolutely loves it and looks forward to it all year long. This year, the camp has started having theme days which are kind of like spirit days at school. Recently, the theme was superheroes and princesses and N was pretty psyched about it. As princess and superhero day approached, however, I […]

By with 61 comments
Mirror Mirror on the Wall

My daughter put this little mirror in front of my face so I jokingly say “Mirror, mirror on the wall, who’s the fairest of them all?” And my son, completely serious, says “What mall? Who’s the fairest OF THE MALL? Get it? Come on…you know that shit is  funny. SMILE!

By with 13 comments
Grandma Came. And Left.

Well…my baby is now officially four years old. He keeps saying he’s five (but I hope that never happens. I want him to stay just like he is forever *sniff*) And wonder of wonders…I managed, somehow, to get my house clean and almost all the laundry washed and folded (but not all put away because apparently, when ALL our clothes […]

By with 17 comments
Creepy Kiddie Accessories 2.0

A long time ago, I recall seeing wigs for babies and being all What? The Hell. But in all fairness, at least recognizes that their wigs fall into the patently ridiculous/OMFG category. But lo, there’s a new kid on the wig block and they’ve made it their mission to insure no bald-ish baby girls are ever mistaken for boys, […]

By with 33 comments
To My Mall Ratty White Trash Mom

Last Sunday on Mother’s Day, I awoke around noon and was greeted with a fantastic breakfast (that means BACON), fresh coffee, gorgeous pink Gerber daisies (my favorite) and the sweetest little treasures from my children. Accompanying the gifts from my daughter was a card/drawing she made at school that touched my heart—but also made me scratch my head a bit […]

By with 37 comments
Braggity McBraggerson Here

Yesterday my son’s teacher told me that they have a new girl in his class. She just turned three and is in a class of mostly boys. The teacher said she had looked so sad all morning and nothing they said or did seemed to make any difference. That is until my son, who is not even 4 yet, went […]

By with 14 comments

At the mall… T: *whining* It’s not fair. Why does he always get to ride in the stroller? Me: Because he’s three and you’re eight. You’re really just too big for the stroller now. T: *indignant* That’s no reason to not let me use it!!!

By with 2 comments
For My Baby Boy

I actually gathered all the photos to make this video of my son about two years ago. I tried unsuccessfully to make it in iMovie but frustrated and supremely annoyed, I quit and for two years the pictures sat in a folder on my desktop. I wanted to make this little movie because somewhere, deep down inside, I feel like […]

By with 8 comments
It CAN Happen to You

After reading an article in the Washington Post questioning whether accidentally leaving a child in a car (resulting in the child’s death) is a crime, my heart ached and I felt kind of sick. I always do when I think about a baby or toddler strapped into their car seat either baking or freezing to death, alone, in the backseat […]

By with 23 comments

Son: Mommy, you my fwend. Me: Awww…you’re my friend, too, buddy Son: And TV my fwend. Me: *cringing on the inside* TV? Really? Son: Yes Me: Okay, but who do you like better—mommy or TV? Son: TV

By with 11 comments