Category Archives: Personal

I’m Sorry We Made Fun of You, Gerabaldine

When I was a little kid, my friend had this kind of ugly, knock-off Barbie that was almost completely bald save for a few follicles of millimeter-long brown hair. I don’t know why she was bald but we named her Gerabaldine. And we laughed and laughed. What a hoot, right?!

I had actually planned on blogging about something only marginally related to my hair situation and not at all about my hair itself. But… I figure I’ll see some of you sooner or later and I won’t be able to hide it so…we may as well just go there and get it over with.

My hair is falling out. A lot. Get the whole story »

Noise with Dirt on It

Yesterday, after school, I took my daughter to a new dentist…a grown-up dentist. Apparently our insurance thinks when kids turn 10, pediatric dentists are a specialty they shouldn’t have to pay for anymore.

This office was weird. It was so…mature feeling. And having just been at my son’s pediatric dentist last week, the differences were glaring—no toys in the waiting room. No kids shows playing on a TV. No balloons or goody boxes.

The waiting room was finely appointed in a way not suited for kids, the magazines were definitely of the non-kid-friendly variety (I’m looking at YOU, Cosmopolitan and Sports Illustrated Annual Boobies and Swimsuits Issue) and it was quiet. So very quiet. Get the whole story »

I Don’t Want to Use the C Word But…

When I have a problem, I do what any rational person would do… I ask the internet.

So, I have a problem.

And while there can be much fodder for joking when you say someone is “crazy”…this is not a joke.

A friend of ours is losing it.

“It” being his mind. Get the whole story »

Not Smarter Than a Kindergartener

After I picked the kids up from school, I made a stop at a charity thrift store to drop off some donations. Being that close to the doors of a thrift store, where all sorts of treasures lurk, I fought the urge to go inside but my fetish for Danish modern enamelware and the possibility that some might be in there waiting for me was more than I could resist—I fetched the children and headed for the door.

As we were approaching the door, a guy cleaning the glass outside also moved towards the entrance and stood alongside the opposite door, as if he were waiting to go in behind us. I thought nothing of it.

As I was stepping inside, I felt something wet hit my left eye and simultaneously go in my mouth. Get the whole story »

Anywhere But Here: The Autumn of My Discontent

So…this is the time of year that I always become unsettled and want to make a major change RIGHT NOW.

If my calculations are correct, it’s also the time of year I get pregnant—Note to self: DO NOT get knocked up.

Anyway, it’s the fall, my favorite season, that does this to me every year. It’s a tiny bit less hot here and it gets dark earlier, neither of which are that impressive unto themselves. They do, however, remind me (along with Twitter and countless blogs) that somewhere else, it’s REALLY fall. Get the whole story »

I’m Just Not Ready for Any of This

Ugh…today is a hard day and it’s only 10:45am.

It started last night with the huz and I talking about our ten year old daughter who is starting to ask questions about Santa Claus. Of course we want to be honest with her but 1) she asked when our five yr old was around, so we really couldn’t and 2) once you spill the beans about Santa, the whole house of cards will come tumbling down—Santa Claus, the Tooth Fairy, the Easter Bunny—all that magic will evaporate in an instant. I’m not ready for that.

And today, my daughter has her last cheer event of the season. They cheer at games until October and then they do competitions for a while and then the season is over. I’ve been a very involved cheer mom and so it was hard to put her in a car this morning with her team, knowing I won’t have any contact with her until after 7pm tonight. At the last competition, cheerleaders and parents weren’t totally separated all day but at this one we are and I hate it. I didn’t even get to hug her goodbye this morning. She was in the car doing something and then BAM…they were leaving. I told her I loved her and she’s like “Okay, bye mama”  OUCH. Get the whole story »

30 Days of Truth – Something I Have to Forgive Someone For

There are lots of things people have done to me that, while I no longer dwell on them, I can’t say I’ve “forgiven” them. Even so, I do believe forgiveness is a gift you give yourself; to release yourself from the burden of being angry or hating someone. I just don’t think it’s always so easy, particularly when someone doesn’t even care that they’ve wronged you.

I know forgiveness shouldn’t be contingent on it but it really does help if the other party at least feels bad about their transgression…but what do you do when they clearly don’t? I think those are the hardest people to forgive.

Some things that I’ve yet to forgive are just too fresh. Some involve people you might even know. And I’m not going to step in that particular pile of manure today. It will have to keep a while longer.

The thing I do need to forgive someone for, many someones, really, are all the people who kept a very big secret from me for most of my life. If I hadn’t found out by accident, they’d still be keeping it. I just can’t get past that. Oddly enough, I’ve forgiven the person at the center of that particular shitstorm—I know my father never meant to deceive me.

The others…I don’t know what they could have done differently but I still don’t forgive them because it felt and still feels so much like a mass betrayal; a conspiracy, a plot in which I was the dupe…the fool.

I can talk to them and be cordial to them and send them the obligatory Christmas card every year but in the end, they remain unforgiven.

It’s been forever since I’ve done a meme.

To be honest (heh) I think I *may* have even gone through a phase after my first year of blogging where I thought I was too cool for a meme, that they were for newbies and people who were unable to come up with their own content.

Well, I stand corrected. I’m SO not a newbie ;p

This meme, 30 Days of Truth, for whatever reason, really makes me want to play along—something about giving yourself permission to be completely honest is very compelling.

So…I may not do every one on the list but I’m going to try.

The 30 days are listed below should you want to be uncool along with me :)

Day 01 Something you hate about yourself.
Day 02 Something you love about yourself.
Day 03 Something you have to forgive yourself for.
Day 04 Something you have to forgive someone for.
Day 05 Something you hope to do in your life.
Day 06 Something you hope you never have to do.
Day 07 Someone who has made your life worth living for.
Day 08 Someone who made your life hell, or treated you like shit.
Day 09 Someone you didn’t want to let go, but just drifted.
Day 10 Someone you need to let go, or wish you didn’t know.
Day 11  Something people seem to compliment you the most on.
Day 12  Something you never get compliments on.
Day 13  A band or artist that has gotten you through some tough ass days. (write a letter.)
Day 14 A hero that has let you down. (letter)
Day 15 Something or someone you couldn’t live without, because you’ve tried living without it.
Day 16 Someone or something you definitely could live without.
Day 17  A book you’ve read that changed your views on something.
Day 18 Your views on gay marriage.
Day 19 What do you think of religion? Or what do you think of politics?
Day 20 Your views on drugs and alcohol.
Day 21  (scenario) Your best friend is in a car accident and you two got into a fight an hour before. What do you do?
Day 22 Something you wish you hadn’t done in your life.
Day 23 Something you wish you had done in your life.
Day 24 Make a playlist to someone, and explain why you chose all the songs. (Just post the titles and artists and letter)
Day 25 The reason you believe you’re still alive today.
Day 26 Have you ever thought about giving up on life? If so, when and why?
Day 27 What’s the best thing going for you right now?
Day 28 What if you were pregnant or got someone pregnant, what would you do?
Day 29 Something you hope to change about yourself. And why.
Day 30 A letter to yourself, tell yourself EVERYTHING you love about yourself