Category Archives: Meta Junk

My BlogHer Pix!

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(Sorry Flickr peeps…I TRIED to put them all on there but I exceeded my monthly upload limit or some such crap. Picasa rules! Flickr drools!)

Despite the Drama & Swagwhoring, BlogHer 09 Didn’t Suck

I actually considered writing this post on the flight home when everything was still fresh in my mind but then I thought better of it and took a nap. PRIORITIES, PEOPLE!

Every time I come back from BlogHer I grapple with this post because I want to name every person I hugged, met, reunited with, saw eye-to-eye with, admired or crushed on etc. I want to take the best parts of my experience and commit it to words so my memories will never fade.

I still want to do those things but you know, what if you forget someone? What if you get a name wrong? What if someone is offended or gets their feelings hurt?  (yes, I actually care about shit like that).


That said, I had a fantastic time at BlogHer 09. I really did—far superior to  the last one I attended in 07, also in Chicago. Looking back, I can’t put my finger on it but I just wasn’t feelin’ it. The lovey-dovey inspirational vibe of 06 just wasn’t there for me.

That was remedied this time around because I had a fabulous time and other than feeling pulled in 5 different directions almost every waking minute and never feeling like I had enough time to REALLY talk to people, I don’t have any real complaints.

Yes, people were grabby and greedy about the freebies.

Yes, people bitched endlessly about not getting swag from certain parties and sponsors and yes, people were rumored to be sponsor-hunting rather brazenly.

Yes, some swag bags were reportedly stolen off elevator carts (unbelievable).

Yes, there was some totally made-up drama in the Room of Your Own  panel with Vaginally-Challenged bloggers (more commonly known as “men”) It was stupid and unnecessary and I’m not going to rehash it here. And for the record, I’m okay with men attending BlogHer.

Yes, a baby wasn’t allowed into a private Nikon party being held at an extremely upscale restaurant/lounge (and???).

Even I whined to my friends when I was denied a BlogHer registration bag because they ran out. I owe my pal and roomie Shari for rectifying the situation as she brought my bagless plight (that’s a JOKE) to the attention of  those in charge and they found one for me.

Despite all of the above, BlogHer 09 didn’t suck (read: don’t hate on me or call me a Pollyanna Sugarcoater just because I wasn’t miserable or disappointed)

I met a number of super people/new friends and I was beyond flattered at those who came up to say they enjoyed my blog or were longtime readers because let’s face it, when you leapfrog around and change names as much as I have this year, you kind of don’t expect that—so thank you to all you nice folks. Thank you for taking the time and for making me feel much more positive about where I’m at right now.

All the parties I attended were good in one way or another but a special shout-out goes to MamaPop, and especially Tracey and Catherine, for putting together one HELL of a party. You’ve raised the bar, ladies. Thanks for a fab time.

To everyone who came to our Room of Your Own panel (Blogging Identity and You with myself, Anissa Mayhew and Tanis Miller) I just want to say thanks. YOU made it a huge success and and it wouldn’t have happened without you.

I want to tell my friends how lucky I am to have every single one of you. You really made my BlogHer experience what it was…awesome. You’re like shoes that don’t cause blisters and bra straps that don’t slide and ice cream without penance. You’re ALL the bomb diggity. LOVE.

And finally, the first day I’m home, my skin has totally cleared up.  Why does the universe hate me so much? You know how vain I am, universe. Why do you insist on f*cking with me like this???


Now, for the practical part of my post…

Everyone should put their photo on their business cards. I know you’ll probably feel silly doing that but seriously, it would help me a lot. Just sayin.

As a party co-host myself (The People’s Party) I’m going to go out on a limb and suggest swag bags stop being given out at parties. Offer your guests food and drinks and good music instead. This might cut back on the greed and entitlement issues that have been the 24-7 topic on Twitter and on blogs since Blogher ended yesterday. I know the bags are a huge draw but do you really want people to just come, elbow babies in the head (yes, that really happened), get their bags o’ stuff and then leave? Remove the stuff and remove that element entirely. Of course, I’m only one vote with The People’s Party but that will be my suggestion for 2010.

To those looking for sponsorship, I’d like to suggest you build relationships with companies. They may well end up sponsoring you if you have something of value to offer them in return you but making that the focal point of your conference attendance is ill-advised and makes us ALL look bad.

And to EVERYONE… In the future, try to have a little patience & understanding with your fellow conference attendees. I got into a verbal altercation with another attendee who assumed I was trying to cut her in line at the Tim Gunn thing when I had actually just stopped to say hi to some friends who were in line. She sniped at me. I sniped back. It was really unpleasant and after mulling it over and  putting myself in her shoes, I concluded that I might be irritated if I assumed, mistakenly or otherwise, that I was being cut in line. I went back and apologized to her. She returned the apology and that was the end of it. Hopefully.

And in the same vein, the aforementioned reminds me that I did jump the line at the Nikon party but ONLY because they said they wanted to photograph attendees with Carson Kressley  in pairs and I wanted to be with mah girl, Anissa. I sincerely hope that was understood.

Oh, and Wife and Mommy… I promised you a shout out—I totally didn’t forget about you and your awesome hairbrush contraption.You were very kind to share it with me, a total stranger. So nice to meet you :)

I have an assload of pictures. Some of them are a bit…risqué—nothing REALLY bad—but you know, I like to ask permission so if you did anything you might be embarrassed about in front of my camera, particularly if you were intoxicated, tell me now if you don’t want them published.

Surprisingly, I kind of enjoyed my time at the Expo Hall. By Saturday, the vibe was relaxed, the swagwhoring was at a minimum  and I actually had some really good exchanges with the folks from Pepsi/FritoLay and Clorox Greenworks. I’d also like to give a special nod to Expo sponsor Johnson & Johnson for removing parabens and fragrance from their baby lotion. I was rather vocal last year at J&J’s Camp Baby about them removing certain unsafe chemicals from their products so I’m kinda stoked.

Thanks to Nikon and Estee Lauder for treating us like rockstars and thank you to the always gracious (and incredibly pretty) Isabel Kallman for the Starbucks Recovery Suite on Sunday. It was SO nice to have coffee and pastry with my friends before rushing off to a long day of hellacious air travel.

AND FINALLY…You may have heard about an awesome new site called Aiming Low. See my button in the sidebar? Yeah, well it does kind of rock and you should check it out if only to feel far superior to us because you don’t wear the same pajama pants all day for three days in a row. Not that I would know anything about that. Ahem.

The 3rd Annual People’s Party!


Just in case you haven’t heard..we’re havin’ another pre-BlogHer party and this? Is one party in which not a SINGLE nose will be pressed against the glass. No. Why? Because it’s the 3rd annual PEOPLE’S PARTY and YOU’RE ALL INVITED!  There WILL be free beverages of the adult variety (until we run out of tickets!) so get there on time, wear your dancing shoes, charge up your camera batteries and get ready to party like it’s 1999!!!

The People’s Party 2009
open-invite pre-BlogHer party
Thursday, July 23, 2009  8:30-11pm
Sheraton Chicago X (“Ten”)

Hosted by:

The Bloggess
Mrs. Fussypants
Playgroups Are No Place For Children
Velveteen Mind

Make sure you RSVP!!!

Sponsored by:

DOI Logo
Ringling Logo MomCentral

Gerber Disney Moms Panel

Magic Beans

Disney on Ice pnn

MomCentral Smashies

One2one 3SG_web


On Tuesday April 7th, the world unexpectedly lost a precious little girl named Maddie Spohr, age 17 months. I wrote about Maddie’s passing a couple days ago and my heart continues to ache for Maddie’s parents, Heather and Mike Spohr. I can’t even begin to imagine what they are going through right now.

In this dark and sad time, though, the kindness and generosity of people across the internet and around the world (most of whom didn’t know Maddie any more than I did) has been nothing short of awe-inspiring.

People have pulled together to help the Spohr’s web site remain up after being taken down for excessive traffic by the thoroughly uncompassionate Bluehost.

In less than three days, people have given upwards of $25,000 in donations to the March of Dimes, which Maddie’s mom requested in lieu of flowers.

People have come together to form teams to participate in the March of Dimes ‘March for Babies’ on April 25th and raise money in Maddie’s name.

People have put up web pages aggregating all the hundreds of posts about Maddie (scroll way down to see the list).

People have set up a donation site to help with Maddie’s funeral and memorial service costs (donations STILL needed! Details here)

People have spearheaded meal delivery campaigns for the Spohrs so that they don’t need to worry about cooking or grocery shopping.

I’m awed by all the good in the world. Thank you, thank you, thank you to all you wonderful people out there. You’ve all helped to make sure Maddie Spohr, the beloved little girl with the captivating smile and big blue-green eyes, will NEVER be forgotten.

If you want to help, there are many things you can do:

• Sponsor our Friends of Maddie “March for Babies” team or any of the dozens of other teams from around the country that are walking in Maddie’s name on April 25.

• Donate to help offset the cost of Maddie’s funeral expenses. This would help the Spohrs tremendously.

• Donate $5 towards a gift card for a restaurant in Mike and Heather’s area that delivers because eating is not optional. You gotta eat. Please email me (janet at greenmommedia dot com) OR direct message me on Twitter (@thecaffeinatrix) if you’d like to take part in this. I’ll send a card to them (with your name included) along with a restaurant gift card. I’m hoping to raise a minimum of $75 because everything is expensive in LA.


A P.O. Box has also been set up in Heather and Mike’s name for cards, gift certificates and the like. The box is located inside a UPS store so packages are accepted as well.

Mike & Heather Spohr
11870 Santa Monica Blvd. #106-514
West Los Angeles, CA 90025

Thank you for your kindness, compassion and generosity :)

Madeline Alice Spohr

All I Can Tell You is That it Will Be Tons of Fun

You’re at Teaser #4 out of 6. If you’re wondering what the hell I’m talking about, click on the curtains and follow the purple brick road. OR if you like your surprises to make sense, start at the beginning by going to  Teaser #1.

Either way, all roads lead to awesomeness!


The Unsung Hero of Last Weekend

I was going to do the obligatory post-conference recap but really, other than to say I had got loads of lovely sleep, froze my ass off, ate way too much meat, had a lot of fun with my peeps from thebadtable and beyond, met an awesomelicious new friend, enjoyed all the panels and got some cool stuff, what else is there that would hold your interest for more than two nanoseconds after reading the words “BlissDom09 Conference“? I’m going to take a wild guess and say…not much…because if you were there, you already know it was a good time and if you weren’t, you don’t want to know what you missed and/or don’t care. Am I right?

The REAL unsung hero of Feb 5-8 is my husband. Seriously. Here’s why:

When I got home, my husband had the whole house clean. Like super clean.

And I was a cranky bitch. (in my defense, I started my period the next day)

Anyway, he gets total props because on Friday, he went to lock the door when leaving with the kids and the tumbler and associated screws, springs etc fell right out of the lock and onto the ground. This means he and the kids were locked out. Good times, right?

Before he could fix anything, he had to drop my daughter and son off at a friend’s house to play and then he had to go to Home Depot and get a new lock for the front door.

But before he could get back in the house, he had to break a lock on another door. Then he had to fix the front door lock and then go BACK to Home Depot to get a new (and MUCH BETTER) lock to replace the one he broke while breaking in and then come home and replace that one, too.

Then, same day, he had to pick up the kids, feed them dinner, bundle them up again and take my daughter to a Brownie meeting.

The next day he fixed the dryer which was broken and destined for the curb when I left. I was all ready to begrudgingly throw down for a new one but after some fiddling and general asspainery, he fixed it…for THIRTY BUCKS.

And then he cleaned the house so I wouldn’t have to come home to a disaster.

He dealt with all of that lock business without losing his shit AND fixed my dryer AND cleaned the house AND both kids were in tip top shape…no limbs missing or stitches or anything.

My husband rocks.

Thanks babe, just in case you’re reading this (even though you know you’re not allowed to read my blog :)

Streams of Consciousness

On my old blog, I would hate myself for doing a post like this; all meandering-ish, directionless—BUT ON THIS BLOG? I will do whatever dumb, ill-conceived thing I want! It’s a whole new game and I? Am a GAMECHANGER!

Am I the only one who is already sick of that stupid word?

Also sick of?  Social networking guru, webpreneur and mompreneur. These should be stricken from the LEXICON.

Wait, I like lexicon. It’s a cool word. (We shall not, however, discuss my abuse and occasional bastardization of the words “awesome”)

As you may or may not have noticed, I haven’t blogged a damn thing in over a week, it’s been a real humdinger (and I’m apparently an 87 yr old man). Naturally, this leads to guilt, which is SO absurd because really, who is making me feel guilty about not writing? The blog police? All my legions of fans? Heh. It’s actually rather  arrogant and self-important of me, don’t you think?

Tuesday was my husband’s 40th birthday. We were supposed to throw a big party this weekend but I’ll tell you a little secret… *stage whispers* I really don’t want to have a party. That means we would have to fix our “you have to flush it four times in a very special way” low-flow toilet which will cost a small fortune, so we just…haven’t. That’s  kind of a dealbreaker if you’re gonna have a ton of potentially drunk people at your house, right? I mean there’s no way a drunk person could flush the toilet four  times in a very special way…  And frankly, I don’t need to be judged on my toilet issues.

Also, I would have to clean extensively. I think I’ve already established in previous posts that I will do no such thing —especially since I’d have to clean it all AGAIN the next day. And? I never have fun at parties I’m hosting. NEVER.

I’m thinking since the Superbowl is this weekend, we’ll probably have a get-together out someplace that has a properly functioning toilet. Or two. This will probably happen after BlissDom which is next weekend. (Yes, despite the fact that I am neither blissful nor domestic, I’m going. Please find me and introduce yourself. I don’t bite but I might lick you if you smell really good. Whaaa? Is that a problem?)

So anyway, thinking that I would be expending tons of money and time on a party for the huz, I didn’t go ALL OUT for the huz’s birthday but it was nice… I made a kick-ass dinner (rare around here), baked an awesome triple chocolate cake and got him a few nifty things…one of which is this t-shirt. It’s so him.

I also got us him a French Press. Why didn’t anyone ever tell me how much BETTER coffee tastes when you make it in one those? Really, internet…I thought we were sympatico, that you would never keep such important things from me. You disappoint me *sigh*

* The awesomelicious Youtube vid I embedded was getting all glitchety so I had to take it down. Your loss ;)

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