Frenemies and Other Lame Things

Posted by on April 11, 2013

Well, the world didn’t end on 12-21-2012, which is good. But then again, we have the Korean krazypants, Kim Jong Un, making threats and pointing his nukes at everyone so maybe I shouldn’t get too happy just yet, huh?

Right now, I should really be writing out my thoughts and feelings in the form of a letter (that I won’t send) to a friend who really hurt my feelings yesterday. She’s not just a friend, though—our 12 year old daughters have been friends since they were two. This complicates things immensely.

I won’t bore you with the details except  to say that she made some incredulous claims about my motivations regarding a recent event..something that hurt her child’s feelings but that I absolutely did not do.

I explained my side over and over and offered endless examples of how she’s dead wrong but she “just can’t wrap her head around it”.  At first I felt bad about the situation, even though I didn’t cause it but now, after brewing on it all night, I’m furious and hurt and to be perfectly honest, I think I’d get some small measure of satisfaction if I could just punch her in the face.

But alas…our girls are friends so I will just swallow my anger and let it go…just like I always do with her. Something tells me that can’t be a healthy way of dealing wit things but I loathe confrontations. Actually, the confrontation doesn’t bother me. It’s the fallout. Some things, once they’re said, and no matter how true they are or how right you are, cause irrevocable harm to a relationship and that’s the part that I hate and why I take so much crap as I get older. Twenty  years ago, I would have said exactly what I wanted to say and to hell with the consequences. Whatever happened to that girl?

In other news, I’m looking into occupational therapy for my almost eight year old. He’s almost done with second grade and his handwriting is still so illegible his teacher can hardly grade it sometimes, though she makes a valiant effort.

My question is how did he get to the end of second grade and he still can’t write legibly? My guess is because in every other way, he’s exceptionally bright and his teachers know it so they let the handwriting slide. Oh and the fact that once you’re done with first grade, handwriting, as a skill, is never revisited again. And people wonder why the American educational system ranks so poorly in comparison to just about the entire civilized world. Even though everyone has computers and spellcheck, written communication is still vitally important. DUH.

So, I recently asked for him to be screened by an occupational therapist from the school system and she said because it’s not impacting his learning (um REALLY?), he’s not eligible for an IEP or a 504 plan, which would provide him with the services he clearly needs. In case you didn’t know, writing is actually a very complex task that involves numerous things that most people would never even consider.

I’m crossing my fingers that he can be helped because as he gets older, teachers will be far less tolerant of his chicken scratch and he will most certainly fail the writing portion of the required (and totally asinine) standardized testing that starts in third grade.  *sigh*

You know, I thought as my  kids got older, that things would get easier; that I would actually be less busy, less stressed and less worried but as it happens, that’s not the case at all.

Oh, how I long for the days when our biggest problem was missing naptime or running out of baby wipes.

I’ll elaborate more on this next time as I’ve decided that as my blog has been practically abandoned since Christmas time, I’m just going to keep more of a journal now rather than trying to write interesting posts that would hopefully resonate with someone out there.

I just don’t have the time or energy to collect my thoughts on any one thing anymore. My head is filled with schedules and appointments and worries and gargantuan to-do lists that would impress even the most OCD-afflicted list writer.

On the bright side, my web design business is exploding. I’m always busy and I like it that way.

Now, I have to go psych myself up to do our taxes…because I don’t have enough on my mind already.

Oh hai…I’m still here trying to think of a title for this post. How do you title what is essentially a rambling journal entry?


  • IzzyMom says:

    Wow, this place really IS a tomb. How sad… my poor blog died in my absence and nobody even told me :(

  • I’m here! Just a little late to the party. ;-) I can’t tell you how I’ve missed your posts! I’m glad you’ll be blogging more. Don’t worry about content, just get in the habit of putting something out there now and then until you get your mojo back.

    You’re dealing with so much, I’m surprised your head doesn’t explode. How stressful! Congrats on your successful web design business. Friendships can be tricky. We should chat about this at length. It’s hard for me to comment when I don’t know more details.

  • Apryl says:

    Dude. I just saw this. We were on break last week, so I took a vacation from the internets for days. It was nice, since we couldn’t afford to go anywhere. A little mental check out for me! Anyway, my boy also had atrocious handwriting in 2nd grade. It’s two years later and it’s neater than his sister’s who’s in 6th. Not to dismiss your concerns,but some things do indeed work themselves out. Either that, or I’m a butthead for not looking into something for him back then :)

    With regards to the other thing, I hope she does a post op review and realizes she might be “catastrophizing” a bit, by accusing you of bad intent. But, if she doesn’t, her loss.

  • Panozzo says:

    I hope you and your friend patch things up. But it sounds like maybe she isn’t worth the trouble ???

  • fun photos says:

    Haha Stupendous I enjoy the site. What a cool web site.

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