I don’t know what’s wrong got me so down but I have less than zero holiday spirit this season. Usually, I love Christmas and decorate the shit out of my house and bake cookies and do all that other Martha Stewart-y stuff that I eschew the rest of the year.
But this year, I just can’t muster the required JOY! to make all those things happen and I’m even feeling a wee bit resentful that I have to participate at all.
We’re supposed to decorate our tree tonight and I’m all “Can I just lay here on the couch and read my book?”
I have told everyone to not get me anything. I don’t want to get (or give, really) any gifts and in the interest of avoiding any further exposure to the soul-eating holiday industrial complex, I’m doing 99% of my shopping online.
The sound of Christmas music is grating on my last nerve. It started in CVS the second Halloween ended and now I can’t get away from it! I don’t want to hear ANY songs about snowmen or sitting by fires or winter wonderlands. It’s 79 here today and there are mosquitoes outside. IN DECEMBER. Who can get excited about Christmas when they’re wearing flip flops and bug spray?
It might sound nuts but the whole 12-21-12 thing has me a little freaked out. Plus it’s hard to get excited about a holiday that leaves me a lot poorer than I started and in return, the ungrateful owner of a bunch of stuff I don’t need, want or have room for (side-eyeing my mother-in-law, who keeps buying me placemats and shawls—Shawls? WTH? It’s not 1975—when I really want things like rain barrels and crossbows and big cans of dehydrated food that will last 10 years.
Okay, maybe I’m exaggerating a bit but really, if anyone ever decided to inquire as to what I would like, I’d ask for some really practical emergency-preparedness gear.
Stop looking at me like I’ve watched one too many episodes of Doomsday Preppers! We have hurricanes here and being prepared for any kind of disaster or cataclysm is the smart thing to do and will insure that absolutely nothing happens on 12-21 because there’s that universal law where bad things never happen when you expect them and are ready for them.
See? I’m just trying to outsmart the universe. That’s not crazy at all, right?
Anyhoo… if you were planning on getting me a little something for the holidays, I would NOT react like a total ingrate brat if I were to receive a new first aid kit or some water purification tablets…or if you’re feeling extra generous, a solar generator would be awesome :)
So how are you feeling about the holidays this year? Have you given the whole doomsday scenario any consideration or are you one of those lucky people who aren’t thinking about it at all?