Jedi Mom Trick

Posted by on June 6, 2011

5 yr old: Mommeeeee? Will you wipe my butt? I can’t wipe it like you do

Me: Why is that?

5 yr old: Because I might get poop on my hand

Me: *stifled giggle* Dude. That’s what soap and water are for

5 yr old: *indignant* Noooo…that’s for when your hands are dirty

Me: Um…I think having poop on your hands totally qualifies as “dirty”

5 yr old: Nuh uhhh

Me: Uh huhhh

5 yr old: NOOOO! Dirty is when you have dirt on your hands!

Me: So you don’t think you need to wash your hands with soap and water when they have poop on them?

5 yr old: YES I DO!


HAAAA! See what I did there?

I should have been a trial lawyer.

Or a Jedi.


Whatever. It totally counts.


  • Diana says:

    Haha! Where do they get these things? No, soap and water is not for poop… no siree!

    Oh and speaking of poop can you Jedi mind trick my 6 year old into not having an explosive ass. I’m so serious. If I have to scrub the sides of one more toilet boil… What? TMI? Sorry.

    • IzzyMom says:

      I will totally come over and work my magic…right after I figure out who’s been doing the same thing here. For serious. You’re not alone.

  • Beth says:

    Will you teach me your ways, Obi Wan IzzyMom?

  • PJ Queen says:

    You’re good! Very, very good.

  • It’d be easier to convince my boss to give me a raise and 4 extra weeks of paid vacation than it is to convince my 4 year old that the sky is blue.

    Good on ya, mama!

  • Lisa E says:

    That’s mad lawyering skills. My 7 year old is a champion hand washer. Which is great, because judging from the looks of the potty when he’s done, I don’t want to know what’s going on in that bathroom. Ick.

  • Sandy Hayashi says:


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  • We are TOTALLY Jedi. You hone your skills on a 5yo; maybe, just MAYBE they might work on a teenager. It’s happened for me. ;)

  • Haley says:

    It’s an intersting conversation.You’re very good

  • Jared Karol says:

    do you think that will work on a two year old? And do I have to have studied with Yoda?

  • You need to open an Etsy shop with your Jedi bathroom mind tricks.

    Do you have one about not spitting toothpaste on the mirror?

  • Luke says:

    Good one …i have developed a trick that works great for everything.

    It is …here it comes …”You have 10 seconds”

    How it works ? Simple. “Veronic, clean the table” – no reaction or “ok-il-move-my-ass-so-slowly-so-you-know-i-bored-as-hell”

    “Veronic, clean the table you have 10 seconds, 10,9,8″

    And it works !! Naturally it all for fun, and she knows that yet she just loves that countdowns !

    Now she wants to do everything fast ! Even the stuff she dont liked before now become fun because of “countdown” implementation.

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