Consumer Culture and Kids: Do Our Values Even Matter?
Crocs, Crocs, Crocs… The ugliest shoes ever created and yet so beloved by my seven year old daughter. Well, actually she doesn’t have THE Crocs™. You know, the name brand ones sold in the same shoes stores where they carry all those other ugly, expensive shoes that are supposed to be so awesome and comfortable (SAS shoes? UGLY!!!).
No, she has whatever you call the ones they sell at Target — the ones that were like $6 instead $30 — and she has been very content with her ugly, plasticky, purple Croc knockoffs.
So yesterday, when I announced that we were going shoe shopping because my two year old needed some shoes he could get wet, as well as put on and take off at will (because he’s forever getting his little suede sneakers wet outside and they’re starting to smell a tad funky and his sandal are totally MIA) my daughter suggested “Crocs” for him. I begrudgingly agreed that they were probably perfect for his needs — easy on and off, closed toe, and water impervious…
However, I also let her know that we wouldn’t be purchasing him the brand-name Crocs from the Ugly Shoe Store at the mall. Why? Because he’s two and he could care less who makes his shoes and his feet grow way too fast.
But then I realized that made it sound like if you were older and more aware, that it was perfectly acceptable to care who made your shoes which was, of course, the exact opposite of what I wanted to convey.
So I launched into lecture mode and, in essence, told her that a lot of luxury, brand-name and “designer” things are kind of silly; that some people use them to elevate how they feel about themselves; that labels don’t make you a better person because who you are comes from the inside, not the outside. You know…all the stuff your parents probably told you, too.
She listened patiently and then, upon conclusion, promptly changed the subject to something more interesting to a seven year old. Still, I hoped what I’d said had some impact or had at least lodged itself in her subconscious, ready to be unleashed should she begin to ever give a crap what name is emblazoned on her stuff and sparkly, girly accoutrements are no longer enough to satisfy.
Frankly, the whole thing made me examine my own feelings toward designer and name-brand things. Here I am lecturing to my child about this stuff and I have to wonder if I’m being a hypocrite? Am I practicing the old “Do as I say, not as I do?” when it comes to values?
Well, let’s just say that while I don’t long for one in the least and would never go out and buy an expensive handbag (Coach, Dooney, Louis, Fendi, Gucci etc) I would probably carry one (but only a very tasteful and understated one) if it were to magically fall into my lap because who doesn’t like a nice purse, right? But for me (and not necessarily anyone else), the unconscious subtext of my carrying something so conspicuously expensive is “Hey! This is a very expensive bag and I have one and now I’m cooler and better than I was when I didn’t have it.”
The last time I was in a thrift store (I LOVE thrift stores though I rarely get to go them anymore) I found a brand new navy blue Polo school uniform skirt in my daughter’s size for $4.00. I’m embarrassed to admit that little red polo player on the front made me just the tiniest bit giddy and hello? Polo for FOUR BUCKS! I did, of course, buy the skirt but I still made a point not to mention the designer name to my daughter because I don’t want HER to care about that sort of thing.
I guess I am a hypocrite and I find this very disconcerting. I really don’t want to be brand conscious like that and yet this morning, I found myself cringing inwardly just a little when I was getting into the momvan after dropping my son off at his morning program.
You see, as I was opening my car door, I saw another mom from P’s class parked behind me. She waved and smiled. I waved and smiled back AND took note of her gorgeous black Mercedes.
In front of me? A macked out BMW sport utility…just one of many.
My car? A domestic minivan with the malfunctioning keyless entry computer chip that I may never get fixed ($500+ is the estimate OUCH!).
And in the same moment that I was feeling both dorky and slightly inadequate, I was chastising myself for being exactly how I don’t want my children to be AND concurrently telling myself that if we were some kind of dirt poor hillbillies, we wouldn’t even BE sending P to this school. My inner dialogue is more like a heated group discussion, apparently.
I’m not sure what my point is here except to note that even I, staunch rejector of conspicuous consumption and overpriced designer items, am susceptible to wandering into the keeping-up quicksand that I really want my kids to feel empowered enough to sidestep.
Do I suffer from some kind of unacknowledged middle-class shame for not having the very things I have such contempt for?
And do I have contempt for them because of they clash with my values? Or because we simply can’t afford to live like Oprah and the Donald?
Or am I just a hapless by-product of a covetous consumer culture in which everyone is constantly made to feel inadequate to some degree?
Either way, no matter what the answer is, it seems that there is no shielding your children from the insanity of it all no matter what ‘class” you fall into. Even in schools where the kids clearly come from a lower socioeconomic background, there is still pressure to have expensive designer clothes and accessories.
Though we’re not there yet, I do wonder how to deal with this stuff down the road should my lecturing turn out to be grossly ineffective…
What’s a parent to do? Give in and buy the “right” stuff for your kids, whatever it may be, so they fit in or put your foot down and pray your kid isn’t treated like a total outcast?
See, that’s a tough question because we all remember being kids, right?
There is a period before you discover your individuality where fitting in is THE most important thing ever. Studies show that rejection from whatever peer group a child identifies with, regardless of their standing in said group, does leave a permanent mark on how a child sees him or herself in a social context and that mark is lifelong. Yikes!
Can clothes, shoes and the like really be the deciding factor? I find myself hoping it’s really that simple, despite how much it grates against my seemingly fluid values.
See, I remember begging my mom for Nike sneakers and Levi’s cords when I was about ten. A couple years later it was “earth shoes” and designer jeans a la Jordache, Sergio Valente, Cacharel, Sasson etc. and those suckers were pricey for that time. But I was spoiled AND a child of divorce so I rarely heard the word “no”.
Did having the right attire propel me to the heights of popularity? No, not really.
Did they save me from being a complete outcast and cool-kid pincushion? I have no idea and I guess there isn’t any real way to quantify that but I do know that I don’t ever want my kids to be in that position.
Do a parent’s values even matter in an age where we’ve had to invent a new term for a specific kind of bullying that is becoming more and more common — fashion bullying?
Personally, I think buying Dolce & Gabbana for children is the stupidest thing I’ve ever heard and any parent who raises the bar to that level for the rest of us should be publicly flogged with a D&G belt — in the middle of a Walmart!
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This is so tough. I never fit in as a kid, but I don’t know how much of it had to do with my very limited wardrobe or my personality, other factors etc.
My parents understood my need for name brands. They bought me an item or two every once in awhile. I made a deal with my Dad, though, or rather, he made it with me. If jeans cost $10 at Kmart for the cheap brand, he would give me $10 to buy jeans with. If I wanted to take his $10 and add my own babysitting income to it to buy designer jeans, I was more than welcome to. Also, if I needed 3 pairs of pants and was content to have one pair of designer jeans instead, I could make that decision.
These days, it’s not about clothing brands and car makes for me. It’s about being able to eat out with friends when I really don’t have the money, going to Christmas and birthday parties and spending money on gifts that I don’t have to spend, and in general doing anything I can to prevent myself from being dead balls honest with the people I supposedly love and cherish. Like telling your friend that your WH won’t LET you get a Christmas tree next weekend, rather than explaining that you can’t afford one.
I don’t care so super much about not having a tree, but more the shame that I associate with not being able to afford one. I think that’s what hit you with the Momvan. That shameful feeling, like we make less money or have less money because we are stupid or lazy.
Did any of that make any sense?
I think the best thing we can do, as parents, period, is bolster our children’s self-esteem and sense of self as much as possible without using clothes, shoes, iPods and other material goods as props. These things don’t make us who we are - in fact, sometimes they can get in the way of who we are.
As for any permanent mark on how a child sees him or herself in a social context - I think the best defense against that is being involved in their lives, keeping the lines of communication open and ACTIVE, and modeling the behavior we’re trying to teach.
Having said that, it saddens me to see too many parents opt to buy their way through parenting, whether they can afford it, or not. Parents are still, after all is said and done, the biggest influence on a child’s life. Too many, in my opinion, abdicate that role because of the work involved. The hell of it is, even in abdicating, those parents are still influencing.
None of us want to see our children left out or shunned, but it will happen at one point or another. I say consider the source and move on. That’s where a healthy self-esteem is required - to be able to do that, mean it and not look back with regret.
Really, we are programmed into mindless consumerism by television. I always made it a point to discuss programs and commercials with my younguns. They are very consumer and advertising savvy. The only thing that Ass Burger Boy really harped upon was a cellphone. That’s because he was generally obsessed with phones, period. It wasn’t because everybody else had one.
That’s a hard one. Some of those expensive things really ARE well made, which makes me want them more than their well-thought-of logos. I just try to strike a balance, try to encourage my kids to respect quality over status.
I just think that there is a middle ground you have to tread. You are right, you DON’T want your kids to be the ones that are fashion-bullied bcse they don’t have on the right clothes but then again you don’t want them to think that the sum of who they are is measured by a name brand.
My mom rode the fence by ruthlessly shopping sales for me, to get me the “designer” jeans I HAD TO HAVE to fit in and I wore cheaper blouses and shoes.
And I’ll admit that to this day I’m a victim of Clarice Starling syndrome, with my good bag and cheap shoes.
I figure I can pull off the plain black shoes if I’m carrying Coach or Prada. And I don’t keep a STABLE of good bags. One winter one summer. That’s it.
So, despite the fact that yeah, I too get a giddy by my middle class desire for STUFF……I know I have to reign it in as well.
Maybe my parents did an ineffective job at giving me a moral fashion compass. It was rarely explained to me why I didn’t have the name brands, other than they were expensive. “Expensive” held no water with me, because we seemed to live in a nice house, my parents drove nice cars, we had a boat. WTF? Didn’t they realize how important those things were to a teenager?
I remember getting a pair of irregular Levi’s corduroys missing the signature tag on the back pocket. I actually removed one from a jumper that never fit and sewed it onto those pants, just so everyone would know they were indeed Levi’s (because they were light blue, the signature stitching was hard to deciper, too, so I had to have that label!)
I so understand that feeling of giddiness when a bargain comes along (and knowing that everyone who sees it will think you paid retail for it). It is silly, but since you had most of what you wanted when you were a kid and I had little of what I wanted, I pause to think what makes us both feel like we discovered Uranium when a designer treat manages to dip under the thrift store employee radar.
I hope each of my children would want to be the rugged individualist I was (forced by circumstance to become) during my middle and high school years. I think very bad cat’s parents had it right when they educated her on the difference between owning three pants versus one. It made her determine the importance of that difference and it’s impact on her own wallet. It’s something I hope I’m able to impress upon my kids when the label fixation rears its ugly head.
Until then, I will continue to be excited by thrift store coups and those Lily Pulitzer outfits my MIL buys for my daughter. And, I will still feel a little more confident when I stride through a restaurant with my Coach handbag (that my MIL also bought because I have more pressing things to do with that kind of money). So. hopeless.
Two sides to this coin, and neither of them are “totally” complete answers.
On one side, the conformism side, the best I can see in my interpretation is that there is some sort of balance that can (and needs to financially) be balanced.
Growing up in the same era as you (I guess) I wanted Sasson, and Calvin, etc. jeans. I probably could have gotten away with Lee, or Levis or something “a step down” and still been somewhat satisfied, but what I got were Sears Toughskins, which were guaranteed to be mocked. Know what I am trying to say? There is some (semi) happy ground that can be had (I think).
On the other side of that coin, I think you beat yourself up way too harshly. Is it wrong to want “nice things?” I don’t think so. The “wrongness” comes in when you are willing to give up important things to get it.
I have seen people driving very nice, expensive cars, and meanwhile they are feeding their kids crap because that is all they can afford. Maybe if some of those people spent a little less money on the glitz, they could do better elsewhere.
Plus throw in the people that are willing to work whatever hours are needed to have the extras, but meanwhile spend no time at all with their kids, and well… I will gladly stick with our old Dodge, and be sure I can attend my daughter’s dance recital, or even just to play a game with her from time to time, rather than be a parent by proxy who just stops by to say hello from time to time.
But those are different people. And guess what… those people still have “wants” and “desires” as well. What I am trying to say, is that there is nothing wrong or even hypocritical to want “nice things”
Using your own example, a Coach bag is a top quality item. It is something you can (in theory) have for many many years and it will still look great and won’t just fall apart the same way a common bag will. Is it wrong to wish you could have something like that? Of course not. Give yourself some credit. Not a single example you gave is about “name” alone. BMW and Mercedes are well liked because they are quality, as are other things you have mentioned. That is a big difference from “Crocs” that are a name for name sake, and there is little to no difference between the Brand Name and the knock-offs (they both stink… but that is a different discussion).
So to keep a long comment from getting any longer. Relax. You “standards” are far more in place than you give yourself credit for. And while those “talks” you give, at times may seem to have no effect (when she is in her teens most likely) somewhere the seeds of practicality have been sewn, and your little ones will benefit from your wisdom… eventually.
I remember when Keds where “the thing”. My mom took me to get some and tried to get me to identify the real Keds from the fake Keds without looking at the little blue tag on the heel.
I got it wrong.
That stuck with me.
I still got the real Keds and wouldn’t you know it, the blue tag, the only thing defining them as Keds, fell off the first week I had them.
I shop almost purely second hand. I have had the same feelings you described in your post. Now knowing that my husband is going to be an attorney and that we’ll be in a different social class than I was growing up all those feelings are starting to worry me.
I shop for quality and features. I try to look at the label last.
If a pair of Jeans at Target is going to do the same job as a pair from Gymboree I’m going to save the 35 bucks and get the Target ones. I’d rather we look put together for a lower price and no name clothes than somewhat good with labels spread all over our limbs.
My biggest worry is that kids are so damn mean. I would like to know what I can do now to keep the moosh secure in her identity when she’s amongst the mean girls.
Excellent post Ms. Izzy.
Rock on sister.
The only thing I will say is - I actually bought brand name Crocs for somewhat of an adverse reason than what you said. Not that they need my money now, but they are a Colorado company and I am proud of their success, and it irks me that every other company can sponge off them with knockoffs… so yes, in our family, we buy real Crocs.
But either way - I think the real issue is talking to our children about brands, and the reasons we buy them - in all directions (i.e. I won’t shop at Walmart because I don’t approve of their labor practices, I will buy Crocs because they are a Colorado company, I won’t buy Dolce & Gabbana because it is ridiculously overpriced for a simple brand name - etc… teaching them media literacy from the ground up - so that hopefully they can at least make more informed decisions as they get pressured later.
This is a very tough one for me, mostly because I’ve got teenagers who live in a city where other kids wear $275 jeans and have very other expensive name brand things. Things we can’t afford, and even if we could, there is NO WAY I would pay that kind of money for jeans for a kid. Period. None.
But… and this is a huge but, kids are extremely brand conscious these days, MUCH more than they were when we were kids. Brands are HUGE and they definately DO define who kids are, what kind of ‘group’ they’re in, etc. They provide an identity that is so important in the teen years. Now, I can’t possibly afford to dress my daughter, who is the queen of brand names, in the style she wants to become accustomed to. But I can buy things at the thrift store for a tiny fraction of the price, or at Marshalls for half the price, and still allow her to get the name props while not spending the money. There are some things I will not buy, no matter how cheap. I will not buy purses with logos as the design, like coach or luis vuitton bags. I think they are nothing but advertising and a waste of money. But I will buy 7 jeans at the thrift store for $7 a pair (we’ve gotten several pairs for that unreal price) and I will pay $60 for Uggs at Marshalls. I’ll do so because she needs jeans, a major part of her wardrobe and I don’t care what brand she gets, and as for the Uggs, we live in Boston where it’s freezing cold in winter and they’re the warmest boots you can find. It’s a huge plus that Uggs are totally popular and EVERY girl wears them.
I don’t buy cheap clothing because it doesn’t last. I’d rather buy used than spend the same amount on something that will fall apart in a few washings. So name brands tend to be a better value for us. When my kids were little, name brands didn’t matter as much as they outgrew their clothing before it could be wrecked. But quality DOES matter a lot when kids wear the same size year after year. And quality usually comes with a pricetag to match.
Now, with that said, my BFF is, by far, the cheapest person in the world. I mean, she’s beyond tight. She’s ridiculous. She has 2 kids and she dresses them in crap I wouldn’t even consider letting my kids wear. Plus, she will not spend money on even big events. Her daughter’s bat mitzvah outfits were all bought on Ebay. If you won’t spend money for special occasions, you’ve got issues, imo. Her son, who is 17 and autistic, is clothed in stuff that makes him stand out as a TOTAL dweeb and she doesn’t get that this isn’t fair to her son. She thinks because he’s oblivious, it’s OK to make him a laughing stock. She won’t even buy him the right size, so the kid is always in high-water jeans that fit abysmally. It’s criminal and I’m always on her to stop it. It’s bad enough that the kid is autistic, has bright red hair and looks remarkably like Howdy Doody, but she dresses him in the UGLIEST clothes, cheap crap, and he looks horrible all the time. Why would a parent do this to a kid? I do not get it at all. My friend is very anti-fashion (putting it mildly) and she has horrible taste, but geeze, open your eyes and look at what the other kids are wearing. At least TRY to make your kid fit in. But no.
So for me, it’s a really loaded issue. I see how my friend handles it and that infuriates me. I think it’s only a step or two away from child abuse to make your kid stand out so much for hideous clothing choices. But on the other hand, I hate paying for walking advertising for ‘designers’ and I think most of the designer clothing is horribly overpriced. Used, I’ve got no issue with it. In fact, I feel like I’ve won the lottery when I find something like a designer dress for practically nothing.
I try to instill these values in my kids, too, and for the most part I’ve been successful. When my kids get their fall clothing allowance, they want to head to Marshalls where they know they’ll get much more for their buck than at Macys. But then again, my daughter and I love to wander through Bloomingdales and look at all the designer stuff, too. I guess we appreciate the fashion and the art involved, but we both realize that it’s overpriced and not for our family.
But, we do both have real brand name crocs!
One thing I forgot to mention. Brand names and styles are very regional. Here in Boston, the absolute MUST HAVE items for preteens and teens (girls) are North Face Denali jackets, preferably more than one, good jeans (abercrombie, american eagle and aeropostle are the ‘cheaper’ brands, paper cloth denim and 7 are the high priced brands) and Uggs. So Low yoga pants are huge for the middle school set, not so much for high school. In the summer you must have many many pairs of flip flops to match every outfit. Paul Frank underwear and pajamas are valuable commodities. And of course, Red Sox gear.
I’m guessing that in Florida, North Face jackets, Uggs, and other winter apparel isn’t as highly valued!
[head explodes]
umm, yeah. i’m pretty much torn between my more noble, anti-capitalist self, and the desire to have my daughter accepted by her peers — for her to not be the only kid without crocs, etc. it’s a hard line to walk, and i have no wisdom, only head-nodding agreement and understanding.
My child is too young for this to be an issue, but I worry that it WILL be an issue, because I know it is in the little materialistic town I live in. Like Sweetney, I’m agreeing and understanding.
My family was very comfortable but we never had the designer or cool labels- we shopped at normal department stores and bought what was on sale. I remember in junior high the “IT” thing to do was to bring your gym clothes back and forth in a “The Limited” bag. Everyone brought their clothes in one of those bags and I was so envious since my parents didn’t buy our clothes at The Limited because they were too expensive. I was so excited when my parents bought me a single shirt from The Limited. I was more excited about the plastic bag than I was the shirt because then I too could bring my gym clothes in the coveted black and white bag.
I think the biggest determining factor as to whether or not your kids are into brand names is their group of friends. I was lucky not to care too much about that stuff because none of my friends cared either. However, one of my brothers hung out with friends who were mostly pretty well-to-do and he was very concerned about the brand of clothing he wore.
It’s a fine line to walk; my son is only eight months old so I have a while to figure it out but if it’s that important to him, I suppose he can save up his money for the clothes himself. Maybe that would teach him how little importance it really has on life. Of course, I just hope he ends up being much more self-assured and confident than I was at that age!
Growing up I wore a mix of cheap and name brand. So did my husband. I didn’t care. These days we both choose cheaper brands because we are not the type of people that spends large amounts of money on clothes no matter the amount of money we have (and currently it isn’t a whole lot considering the hubs is still in school and I’m a WAHM so you can call me one of the “dirt poor hillbillys”) LOL.
The only thing I splurge on every now and then is VS which is actually pretty cheap compared to many brands.
I think it’s easier when you have boys to not care so much about brands. and thats they way I hope it stays as mine gets older. This year when our son started kindergarten we didn’t shop at the cheapest discount store nor did we buy expensive clothing instead we bought things we knew would last through many stains & washes. :)
I just wish these types of pressures and issues didn’t exist for children as there are so many more important things. It’s outrageous but that’s life.
Such a timely post.
I have been going round and round about these things in my own head.
It’s the word more.
I don’t buy for label, I buy for quality.
Will it flip you out to know I once paid $30 for a pair of kids tights? And then bought two more pair? It was MA, it was winter, it was cold and her cheap tights kept ripping!
I still have those tights five years later and the younger child wears them now!
I’ll buy Carter’s because it’s soft and wears well.
I hope my girls are learning to buy what they like and good quality…but we’ll see.
Simply buying for the label? I agree with your lecture.
Buying a label because you like the item and it’s good quality? That’s reasonable.
I do love the Crocs. I think they are cute and perfect for most of the year here. But we did get the off brand. :)
Again really timely, and you nailed so well things brewing in my own head, especially:
“So what’s my deal?
Do I suffer from some kind of unacknowledged middle-class shame for not having the very things I have such contempt for?
And do I have contempt for them because of they clash with my values? Or because we simply can’t afford to live like Oprah and the Donald?
Or am I just a hapless by-product of a covetous consumer culture in which everyone is constantly made to feel inadequate to some degree?
Either way, no matter what the answer is, it seems that there is no shielding your children from the insanity of it all no matter what ‘class” you fall into. Even in schools where the kids clearly come from a lower socioeconomic background, there is still pressure to have expensive designer clothes and accessories.”
So what’s my deal?
Do I suffer from some kind of unacknowledged middle-class shame for not having the very things I have such contempt for?
And do I have contempt for them because of they clash with my values? Or because we simply can’t afford to live like Oprah and the Donald?
Or am I just a hapless by-product of a covetous consumer culture in which everyone is constantly made to feel inadequate to some degree?
Either way, no matter what the answer is, it seems that there is no shielding your children from the insanity of it all no matter what ‘class” you fall into.”
Julie
Using My Words
“My inner dialogue is more like a heated group discussion, apparently.” — snort!
I haven’t decided where I fall on this continuum yet. I was agonizingly unpopular in middle school and high school because I didn’t have the labels that others had — and I know that built character. On the other hand, I cringe when I think of my girls going through what I did.
Right now I do buy a lot of kids clothes from certain stores: H&M, Old Navy, Gap, Hanna. I admit this sounds like I’m label conscious, but it’s more that I’ve gotten where I hate to shop and I know if I go one of those places I’ll find things that work. I do buy lots of stuff at Target, too. Honestly, I’m hoping to teach my girls that an eclectic look is more important than a conforming one. But we’ll see how that goes.
I remember my mother driving to my high school to really COUNT the number of BMWs, Porsches and Mercedes’ because I insisted (as a 16-year-old) that ever other kid had a brand new “cool” car. I was complaining about my “used” car. I am ashamed now.
Balance has got to be the solution. As a kid, I remember being over the moon when my mother bought me a polo sweater (but I didn’t have a drawer of them either).
Love your line, “my inner dialogue is more like a heated group discussion, apparently.” So funny.
Dude, my grandma wore SAS like it was going out of style!!!
As for fashion bullying (love that term by the way!), I totally agree. It is ridiculous that I work with high school kid’s who carry Coach purses!
I think the reason that you’re feeling to schizophrenic about your brand consciousness is because, in the last X number of years, we as consumers have had to become completely schizophrenic about brands.
Thanks to super-cheap imports and stores like Walmart that will sell you anything for nothing, we not only need to worry about spending too much and paying a “premium brand premium” (like $300 designer jeans) but we also have to worry now about paying “deal premiums”, sacrificing product quality for for illusion of saving money.
One example that I’m constantly running into is discount, imported kitchen appliances. I could spend $400 on a Kitchenaid stand mixer, or I could spend $60 on an extremely off-brand stand mixer at Walmart. While the cheaper mixer is something like 80% less, is it a deal when I need to regularly replace it when it breaks in a year? Is it a deal when I discover that it’s woefully underpowered? Is it a deal when all the accessories snap and break?
The Kitchenaid, on the other hand, is a premium product. Am I paying for the name on the side? Could I get something of comparable quality for less money?
The question of generic products has gotten much more complex than “are store-brand corn nibblets the same as green giant?” We not only need to worry if we’re spending too much on any given thing, we not have to worry if we’re spending too little.
To me, there is a difference between things that are expensive because they are well-designed and well-made versus things that are really and truly just about the name. For example, I do own a Coach bag. The leather is amazing, the hardware sturdy, and when I was mugged and the kid dragged me down the street by my bag, the handle didn’t even think about breaking under the strain of my considerable dead weight. BUT - the fact that a Coach bag in CLOTH is as expensive as it is seems stupid to me. I would never shell out that much for a bag that was just cloth just because of the maker, and I think carrying the logo’d ones is tacky. For me, the simple leather bag was worth it because itis so sturdy and classic, I will use it forever. But then again, my clothes tend to be gap, old navy, or winners (our version of bargain stores like TJ Maxx), because for most clothes, I’m not seeing a major difference. I’ll pay more for a better fibre, but not for a little logo emroidered on.
For kids, they wear their clothes for such a short time, it doesn’t seem worth it to put much money into them, because all notions of classic or cost per wearing go out the window. Pumpkinpie has no labels priceier than gap, and even that is mostly on sale, because I think they are pricey for a kid.
For some items? Well, I can understand appreciating the luxury items, even if you dont’ think they are necessary or are being misused to broadcast something about the person’s self-worth. Let’s face it, they are good-looking and usually well crafted. AND yes, our society values wealth. We all know wealth would be nice to have at least a bit more of. It makes things easier.
Where I don’t agree with you is that carrying a nice bag or driving a good car necessarily means you think you are better. I don’t think carrying a Coach bag makes me better, I think it makes me a lucky to have been able at one point to afford something so nice and sturdy (I couldn’t now). I don’t point out that it’s Coach, someone would never know unless they were familiar with the brand’s design. Similarly, I know people who drive nice cars because they race or drive rallies and really appreciate the handling, and were willing to pay more.
I don’t think that’s always the case, there are certainly people who hide behind the designer names and DO think they are better than others for being able to afford them, just as there are people who think that living in a more upscale neighbourhood or going to a more expensive school make them better. definitely. I just think that’ not everyone who uses these things, is all.
Sorry this turned into such an essay!
Gah! I probably came off as a judgmental jerk, which I didn’t realize until I read your comment.
I should clarify that I was referring to myself when I said the subtext of carrying a pricey luxury item is that I am now a better, cooler person. Like that’s MY unconscious thought process….
I didn’t mean to imply that’s what other people are consciously thinking. In fact, I don’t think it’s really a conscious thing at all for the average person. I think it just feels GOOD to have nice things. It’s the cultural conditioning behind that feeling that really fascinates me.