Imperfect but Proud

I know I’m not a perfect mom. Far from it, in fact.

I yell at my kids sometimes; sometimes more than sometimes. I let them eat cereal and yogurt for dinner the other night. I let them watch plenty o’ TV. I look forward to bedtime with a fervor that is shameful and some days, despite my desire to be fully engaged, I feel like I’m just phoning it in. As I said, I’m far from perfect.

But sometimes… I stand back and I look at what I’ve done for the past seven (almost) years and I’m fucking amazed. I amaze myself. I have birthed two children, raised one for nearly seven years and another for nearly two and I haven’t lost them, killed them or (to my knowledge) psychologically scarred them thus far.

They make it to all their scheduled pediatric check-ups, my daughter has been to the dentist for checkups and cleanings (with no cavities!) and they always have clean clothes and mostly healthy food to eat, all thanks to me.

They both get plenty of rest and I try my damnedest to give them plenty of experiences and fun things to do, even if it’s just in our own backyard, and I try to create as many good memories for them as I can without driving myself nuts.

I’ve tried to instill in them good citizenship and to be better than I am (i.e. don’t swear like a sailor or curse at people in traffic) and I try to minimize other negative influences as much as I realistically can.

I know that none of these are earth shattering things. People do this stuff every day and sometimes with way more kids than I have. I guess I’m just in awe of it all because when I was younger I never pictured myself raising kids OR doing all these domestic things that I admittedly don’t like that much.

I never thought I was the kind of person who would want to care for little beings that don’t have tails or that I would be any good at it. But I do and I am. And I have to admit that I’m really proud of myself.

But let me clarify…I’m not proud because my kids are such stellar human beings. I mean they are but they’re little. There’s still a lot of time for me to mess them up.

I’m proud because even though I don’t always love this job, I still get up and do it every day and I still look at each new day as another chance to get it right and leave everything that didn’t go right the day before in the past, which I think is critical to my sanity.

And my kids are happy. Even though I get impatient sometimes with my daughter’s penchant for drama or with my son for dumping the cat food into the cat water again, they KNOW I love them.

They KNOW I care about them and want the absolute best for them in life. They KNOW that I accept them as they are. They KNOW I’m CRAZY about them.

In conclusion…even though I’m not perfect, I’m a damn sight better at this than I ever thought I would be. So I walk a line between motherly self-recrimination for all the things I do wrong and self-congratulation for even being able to do it at all, let alone really well. And I think that’s okay to say out loud. Or on a blog.

I want to hear you brag. Tell me what makes you proud of yourself as a parent; tell me what you’re doing right, or what you’ve accomplished that you never thought you could do.

Go on. Toot your own horns either here or on your own blog (and let me know about it). You surely deserve it and if YOU don’t do it, who will?

Imperfectly Perfect Moms Linking to this Post:

Tracy of Random Thoughts of the Neverending Mind

Chris of Serendipity Mine

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And FWIW…because everyone in the flippin’ universe is complaining about truncated RSS feeds (aka “summary” feeds), I’m going to take a chance that my content won’t be ripped off again and stop truncating my feeds and see how it goes. If you’re strictly a feed reader, this should please you. Here’s to hoping you’ll still visit and show me some love every now and then :)

Never Trust Your Eyes Again

Many times in the past I’ve shown you the power of Photoshop being used in ways that likely contribute, at least in part, to the body image issues that most women suffer from.

Well, in the continued interest of pulling back the curtain so we can all stop comparing ourselves to things that aren’t even real, I once again bring you a video that will blow your fracking mind!

But be warned, it’s not 100% work/kid safe. If you can’t watch it now, come back and watch it when you can and prepare to be amazed. The person behind this has some serious skillz!

Hat tip to Nic of Bridehood Revisited via MamaPopTalk

BlogHer Head Count 2007

Alright, people! BlogHer ‘07 is a mere 61 days away and it’s time to start taking names and compiling a list so I can plan my stalking well in advance.

Sooo…if you’re going, please add your name and URL to the Mister Linky form at the bottom of the post and click ENTER.

Then, if you’re comfortable sharing such info, leave a comment with your arrival day and approximate time and the hotel, hostel or whatever in which you’re staying. If you are looking for a roommate, feel free to post that, too.

Now? Help spread the word about the list by grabbing the “I’m on the list!” button above for your sidebar and be sure to link it back to this post. Email me if you need me to send you some code –>izzymom at gmail dot com

And if anyone is interested, here is what I wrote after BlogHer 2006.

(If you’re not going, I apologize for writing something that might seem exclusive. It’s certainly not my intention. I’m now please to be begging your pardons :)

And So it Begins

Summer, that is. School officially ended yesterday and until TQ starts camp, I’ll have both kids home full time for the next 18 days.

I’m okay with this because I have a jam-packed calendar of fun planned. In my head. Whether or not these plans will actually materialize remains to be seen.

Today is a prime example of the whole “best laid plans” thing gone awry. See, I got my period last night and I’m practically comatose today. Why does it make me soooo tired???

In any case, I’m very glad that it came because we were really stupid and played a little Russian roulette a couple weeks ago. *kicks self hard*

Oh, and we’re out of coffee, which is the proverbial nail in our collective coffin. I MUST have one cup of coffee every morning or else everyone suffers right along with me. Period + no coffee = cranky mommy.

Now imagine this whole scenario with two children tugging at you and making these relentless demands for, like, food and stuff. Slavedrivers, they are…

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If Only Life Were Like TiVo…

Today my little girl is going on an adventure. Without me. Not that we haven’t been apart before but I’ve never been the type to just drop her off at something (besides school and close friends & family’s houses) and leave her well-being to someone else.

It’s not that I’m overprotective... Okay, it is. Sort of. But still. I just don’t fully trust anyone to watch over her the way I would. I’m her mother.

Anyway, she’s actually getting picked up from school with a bunch of other kids in a Hummer stretch limo and being taken to a fancy restaurant to celebrate a friend’s birthday.

So what’s the big deal? What am I worried about?

Oh gosh, I don’t know. All sorts of unlikely scenarios have flashed through my mind…child molestors in the bathroom; accidental peanut ingestion (she’s deathly allergic); car accidents; her getting left behind. You name it.

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