Alive and Kicking…Sort of

Oh. My. God.

Saturday night I got hit with the most evil, vile stomach flu I’ve ever had. I spent the hours between 3 and 5am becoming intimately acquainted with my toilet and trashcan whilst I vomited, dry-heaved and hyperventilated and concurrently spewed something that felt like water out the other end. I wouldn’t know the specific details because I couldn’t lift my head from between my knees. Once I was able to get up, I collapsed on the sofa, drenched in a cold sweat.

A short while later, I drank some water and it was right back to the bathroom for a another repeat performance. I tried to sleep afterwards but couldn’t because every joint in my body was racked with excruciating pain. I ended up utilizing some old Phenergan suppositories from a previous stomach virus to try and get some sleep.

Yes, suppositories that go up there.

In minutes the Phenergan started to work and I dozed briefly but mostly just felt all floaty.

When the kids woke up about an hour later, I took a chance on my iffy stomach and ate some Benadryl (to induce a dead sleep) and holed up in my bedroom. Husband was on childcare detail while I slept almost a whole day away, only waking to use the bathroom and guzzle liquid Tylenol.

Today I feel somewhat better. Not nearly as achy but still weak and rubbery. I have to try and eat something, I guess, but there are two things I will never, EVER eat again… chocolate chip ice cream (because I ate a little bit before bed and I could taste the chocolate chips the whole time I was barfing) and honey barbecue chicken tenders because I nibbled on one a few hours before I got sick and will forever associate them with this experience that literally made me pray for death.

I only got up this morning because I was starting to feel an indentation in the bed and imagined, in between very vivid dreams, that I could feel bedsores forming on my ass. And to find out what day it was because I really had no idea. Thank God Husband stayed home today to take care of me and P.

So, if I haven’t replied to an email or done something I said I would do, please forgive me. I hope to be back in the swim by tomorrow. But right now, I’m giving serious consideration to taking a nap on the sofa because I’m exhausted again…