It’s a bird, it’s a plane, it’s BlunderMom!
We all know the media exaggerates stuff, especially when it comes to celebrities, but there probably IS a kernel of truth to everything that’s been said about Britney Spears and her less-than-stellar parenting skills. Hell….there’s probably an entire cornfield of truth to all of it. I have to admit, however, after the week I’ve had, that I actually feel a little sorry for her.
I know. I know. She’s an idiot. And poor Sean Preston… (why does everyone call him by both names? Am I the only one that thinks that’s weird?) But now that I’m bunking with parenting blunders hall-of-famer Spears, I’ve had to stop and consider whether I’m in any position to to say anything about Britney (slutty videos, orange jumpsuits and numerous other fashion-don’ts notwithstanding)
Now, in my own defense, 2/3 of what I’m about to confess to is really not my fault. I had no control over the circumstances but in typical sacrificial mom fashion, I blame myself anyway. Somewhere
between conception and birth I solemnly swore to protect my children from everything bad, including circumstances beyond my control. So even though they’re not my fault, I’m still guilty.
Painful Blunder Number 1
Earlier this week, after spiking a very high fever and projectile vomiting all over me twice, I decided to take my 11 month old son (Peebs) to the evening pediatrician. I got him dressed and as I was exiting the bedroom with him on my hip, I turned to my left to pull the door closed behind me, not knowing, because I don’t have lizard eyes on the sides of my head, that he was turned to the right, sticking his chubby little hand into the crack of the door jamb. Yes. I crunched his little hand in the door, leaving a crease and a matching purple bruise. We won’t even discuss the crying.
There’s no way I could have known he would do that BUT…I still should have prevented it. For what it’s worth, the pediatrician said it was fine. But did that make me feel better? Hardly.
Painful Blunder Number 2
Once we’re at the pediatrician’s office, in the exam room, Peebs decided to open the cabinet under the sink. I look and there’s nothing in there so I let him open and close the cabinet doors. He loves doing this and has never sustained an injury from doing it at home so what’s the harm? Well…apparently the doctor’s office has those newfangled hinges that are on the inside. They have a little gap in them perfect for crushing small fingers and he managed to find it. Squish goes the finger. More screaming and crying. Lather, rinse, repeat.
I could have prevented that. It was stupid of me to let him play with the cabinet doors. I just didn’t want to hear his inevitable cries of protest when I tried to stop him. I was exhausted and lazy and I took the easy way. Totally. My. Fault. His finger is fine. Me? I’m fine if you don’t count being mired in mommy guilt.
(and the vomiting and fever appears to be viral)
Embarrassing but Painless Blunder Number Three
AKA The piece de resistance…
Yesterday, Peebs got locked in the car with it running.
I know.
Shut up.
Here’s how it happened. I stopped at a friend’s house to drop something off. My daughter wanted to go to the door with me so she could say hi to her pal so with the engine still running, I got out, opened the sliding door and let her out. I closed it and when I tried to open the driver’s side door to grab the item I was dropping off, it was locked. I checked every door and the back window and they were ALL LOCKED.
But I didn’t lock the doors. The car is possessed. It has always done weird stuff like lock automatically but it never locks the driver’s door. Never. Until Now.
I called the auto club and for the 20 minutes until they arrived, I paced furiously, talking a mile a minute, repeatedly stating that I have no idea how this happened and checking on the baby every 11 seconds while waving and smiling at him through the glass like some kind of crazy person.
He never stopped grinning and waving back at me. He was perfectly fine. I was a wreck. And even though it wasn’t my fault, I am still guilty. I should never trust any stupid car to act properly and even though I was just going to the front door for 30 seconds, I probably should have unloaded him despite the aggravation of having to put him right back in. I shouldn’t have been lazy.
So now you see why maybe I can’t feel superior to Britney anymore…
Even worse for her, though, is that she’s preggers which is already tough. When I imagine being pregnant with a BABY to care for, well, I can’t imagine it, really. It’s just too icky.
It was really dumb to allow herself to get knocked up again but I can’t help feeling bad for her, despite all her poor choices. I have to believe even though she’s a complete dunce, that she does love her son and that the media frenzy resulting from those poor choices might be adversely affecting her unborn baby with a shitload of undue stress.
Yes, she’s a celeb and she’s supposed to be fair game for the media. I’m just not sure it’s fair for her children. Surely they don’t deserve to have their lives, one before it’s even born, to be such spectacle.
I know I’m in the minority here but I’m a big sap when it comes to babies and pregnant women. You guys KNOW I watch A Baby Story at least three times a week.
So, feel free to disagree with me or flog me for being a blunderously bad mom if you must.
Just don’t be unkind. I’m very sensitive, you know :)
You make a good point. A lot of celebs are never seen with their children.
I can beat you. The other day I let my daughter have my old broken purse. I thought I had cleaned it out but she brought this little brown envelope to me. “Mom, what’s this?” OH CRAP! It’s the VALIUM pill my dentist gave me to take before my upcoming wisdom teeth extraction. Where’s the paparazzi to capture me handing powerful narcotics to my kids?
I too feel bad for Brit, but she knows she’s in the public eye. So. Don’t. Do. Dumb. Stuff. I know I give the facade of being a good mommy when out in public. Once we’re home, I let all my bad mom qualities hang out.
Who doesn’t feel like a bad mom at times, most of the time. There’s a lot of guilt involved with mothering. I’ve done the thing where you lock your kid and keys in the car too. Good Times!
You know how many unplanned pregnancies there are in Big Celebrity World that end in secret abortions? Neither do I, but I imagine there are a lot. Brittany should be applauded for embracing this second (assumed unexpected) pregnancy like any decent mom would.
I drive a Nissan Altima and was horrified the day we found out that the car re-locks itself after a certain amount of time when it’s been unlocked by the remote on the keychain. My husband came out of the grocery store, opened up the back door, tossed the keys into the front seat so he could buckle our baby girl into her car seat, and by the time he shut her door and went to get into his own seat behind the steering wheel, the car had locked itself. It was a hot day and panic set in fast. He was able to get her out pretty quick, but it temporarily traumatized us all.
Every parent makes ‘dumb’ mistakes from time to time. :-)
My darling daughter was four months old when I peed on the stick to my horror and discovered I was expecting. Being preggers and packing an infant around is not fun. So my heart bleeds just a little for the idiot known as Brit. It doesn’t bleed too much though. She is rich and has endless supply of nannies.
As for parental blunders: Imagine a eighteen month old and a five month old and a cold winter night. I was grocery shopping and when I got home I put my daughter in the house with a box of oranges. I put the keys down and went back to grab the baby. My darling daughter locked the door behind me. I panicked, and it took me 45 minutes to find the manager to let me into my house. I was a wreck. My baby was freezing his ass off and my daughter was happy as a pig in shit. She poked holes in all the oranges and thought it was great fun! I still have nightmares!
i whacked my son’s head into the door frame at his first birthday party in front of 20 relatives AND his daycare provider. the screaming was the icing on the cake, believe me.
Your comment on 5/26/06 about when you forgot to strap your daughter into her carseat made me feel 100% better. I made that mistake today with my 2-week old daughter. I took her out of the car after driving around on errands and discovered to my horror that she was not strapped in. God forbid if I got into an accident! I felt like the worst mother in the world and cried about it. Then, I did an internet search to see if there were any message boards, etc. about any other parents who had done this. I read your post, along with the other posts, and felt so much better that I’m not alone!
I also have another blunder to share: when my son was 7 weeks old, I was carrying him in his car seat when he was not strapped into it. The handle was in the down position, so natually, he fell out of it and hit his head on the hard wood floor. We brought him to the ER to have him checked out, and he was fine. I thought the ER staff was going to report us to the child welfare agency, but they did not say anything about our lack of parenting skills!
Anyway, thanks for letting me get this off my chest.
Honestly, in the short-term, there is little that any of these so-called leaders of GM can say that is credible.
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