Have you had an opportunity to watch Real Housewives of Orange County? I only watched it because it came on right after hairdresser drama Blow Out, which is some truly fine reality TV entertainment. RHOC, on the other hand, is…I don’t even know but any show that opens by telling you that 80% of the women in Orange County have breast implants is gonna be compelling in a guilty pleasures, these-people-are-friggin’-wack, Anna Nicole Smith show kind of way.

Basically, all these “housewives” look exactly the same, save for the occasional daring, boat-rocking, live-on-the-edge-by-being-different brunette. Everyone else has that kind of ashy, silvery blonde kind of hair, long, with sideswept bangs, and a too-tan tan that would make George Hamilton envious, Botox treatments (they showed this woman getting a Botox housecall) and these big honeydew melon halves sitting on their bony chests underneath their cami tops. There’s not much that’s real about any of them. Guess that’s what you call irony…

Hubz made a good point not too long ago. We were talking about how everyone and their dog has fake boobage now and he said there are teenage boys growing up right now without ever having even seen real hooters. Leave it to a man to come to that realization. I think implants are kind of gross.

What I wanted to note about RHOC is that whenever someone discusses someone else, the first thing they refer to is their appearance. One of the older women (Botox housecall lady) talks about this other woman, the first thing she says is “Yeah, she’s skinnier than me with bigger boobs…” And this other “housewife” is talking about some other woman that she met having a “bangin’ bod”. It was really weird. I don’t know about you guys but most of my body fixations are reserved for myself. They sound a little like this:

“Yeah…I got a hell of an ass! Almost two of them! I luuuuurve the way my butt cheeks rest on the backs of my thighs now!”

“Yep, it’s official, I now have those lumpy hip bumps above my bangin’ booty! Woot!”

See? (you definitely will if you’re going to Blogher) Sitting around talking about YOUR body doesn’t interest me in the least. Well, unless you have freakishly large breast implants, which I really loathe, or a spare appendage of some kind. Then I might have to mention you.

One OC housewife said she’ll be getting Botox forever so she won’t ever look older than 32. Psssst… someone wrote that book already. It’s called The Picture of Dorian Gray.

The only semi-normal person on the whole show is this woman’s fiancee. She’s unhappy being a housewife (aren’t we all, honey) and claims there’s nothing to do (because you know how boring it is…there’s never anything that needs to be done, nothing to clean, no laundry to fold, kids to be chauffered around…WHEN YOU HAVE FREAKING HIRED HELP FOR EVERYTHING!!!!) The guy is at home feeding the kids dinner, trying to teach his son not to scratch his ass before touching food, getting them ready for bed and his wife is out partying and whining to him on the phone that she can’t come home yet because her friends aren’t ready to leave. I actually felt sorry for the guy even though he’s one of those cheesy trophy-wife guys.

RHOC was oddly interesting to watch once but I think next time I need a freakshow fix, I’ll catch Daddy’s Spoiled Little Girl instead. I can’t help it. I love watching crazy rich people. It’s a lot like watching a show about aliens. You can’t believe people like this actually exist.

Okay…quick questions for anyone going to Blogher…

When are you arriving? Day, time etc.

What days of the conference are you attending? Friday, Saturday, both? Or just cocktail parties?

I’m going and I already bought my plane ticket. My plane gets in around 4ish on Thursday.

I just want to see what everyone else is doing before I pay for my registration because, you know, God forbid I just do my own thing without consulting every person on the planet first ;-P

If for some reason you don’t want to post your info here, feel free to email me.

Thanks ya’ll!

PS: For anyone who is interested, two new designs have been added to my free banners blog.

When it comes to blogging, naturally, my most favorite topics are me, me, oh and me! But when I’m not busy perfecting my navel-gazing, I’m really most fascinated by other people. I love listening to you and learning about all the things that make you uniquely you. I like hearing your life stories and all the events that have shaped you into who you are today.

If you’ve ever read my Blogger profile, you may have noticed that I listed sociology, psychology, social psychology, trend-watching and studying pop culture as some of my interests. I majored in communications and my minor in psychology was just a few credits short of being a second major. So you get the picture… Now I want to know more about you.

I would like you to choose 4 adjectives that describe your personality/character and then elaborate a bit on each one. How much or how little is up to you. Try to avoid generic adjectives like nice or sweet. Go deep!

Here are mine:

1) Determined — I am not what you’d call a hyper-motivated person but when I finally decide that I want something and set my sights on it, my determination knows no bounds. It’s something most people don’t know about me mainly because I am not often moved enough to tap into it. But when I do, make way!

2) Empathetic — I cannot bear the idea of someone suffering needlessly or having their feelings hurt. Not wishing to overstep my bounds, I sometimes don’t reach out to people like I want to, but I always feel what they are going through.

3) Restless — I’ve been called a “restless soul” and I can’t deny it. I’m always looking for the next thing to get excited about. For me, the term “follow your bliss” speaks volumes. Without something to look forward to, I sometimes feel very deflated and bored. Most of the time I love my life but I require a lot of stimulation and a lot of challenge in order to stay happy. The last time I had that restless feeling for too long, I sold our house.

4) Helpful — I truly enjoy helping people. It’s in my Virgo nature, I guess. The downside is that people think just because you are accommodating and helpful, that you must be a stupid sucker, which I’m not.

**Cameo’s list reminded me of one that I should have included: Loyal. I am very loyal. A more loyal friend you will not find. Unless you screw me. Then all bets are off.

Now it’s your turn. That includes you, lurkers! Do them here and then copy and paste on to your own blog if you want to. Instant content!

If you enjoyed this, check out Julie’s Thursday Third Degree. It’s similar.