Shut up. It’s Good.
They say necessity is the mother of invention and today, I proved that old adage to be true; sinfully, deliciously, and kind of grossly true.
I had a yen for something sweet. While I usually take great care to not load up on sugar and junk food, I couldn’t shake my desire for a treat. (Okay. That’s a lie. I love sweets and eat them frequently but whatever, right?)
So, now that I’m being totally straight with you, here’s the real deal. I don’t buy a lot of junk food because I’ll eat it all of the kids, so when I found myself wanting a treat in the mid-afternoon, there really wasn’t anything to suit my taste. But then I stumbled across my stash of “morsels” from a recent cookie bender baking project and I had a brainstorm…
I melted a trio of milk chocolate, semi-sweet and butterscotch chips in the microwave and spread it on Ritz crackers… Oh. My. God. It’s the bomb! If you like sweet and salty things together like chocolate pretzels or chocolate covered peanuts, you’ll love this.
I know you’re probably thinking it’s kind of trailer park-ish but if you can get past that part, it’s really, really good. And I think just regular semi-sweet chips would work fine.
The funniest part is that I used low-fat Ritz crackers, which is a lot like drinking diet Coke with a Quarter Pounder Extra Value Meal at McDonalds — but I try not to think of that part as I enjoy the pleasures of the uh…chocolate cracker thingys.
And if you don’t mind, next time I bitch about my baby fat, have a heart and don’t remind me of this post :)
(Also, please pardon some of the little issues with my new 3 column template. I still have some kinks to work out)
PS: Do you see the BlogHer button to the left? After you leave your pearls of wisdom, shards of brilliance etc. would you mind clicking it and taking a really quick survey? Thanks!
Oh, mmmmm …. that does sound good. And I’m sure the low-fat crackers were only because that’s all you had on hand. I’ve done much more trailer-park-ified mixes in the past, so don’t worry, you’re not alone. A lot of them involved cream cheese and confectioner’s sugar. Need I say more?
That sounds soooo good. I will so try that one!
I was 100% with you until you said Ritz crackers. For some reason I’ve never been a fan.
As to the diet-coke-with-1/4 pounder issue, I’ve long been a proponent of a theory which may be of some help. If you drink a diet drink with something with super high calories the universe doesn’t know what to do so they cancel each other out. Combining a high calorie, sugar laden food with a diet pop mean neither of them have any calories.
(Unfortunately my ass (and hips, and thighs…) betray the validity of this theory.)
Dude, some of my favorite foods came from the recipe boxes of trailers. I can see exactly how delicious that would be, especially since I am the #1 World’s Biggest Fan of chocolate covered pretzels. Same-ish, right?
PS really really REALLY liking the look!
I was with you until i flung open my cupboard and discovered that I only have garlic Butter Ritz right now - D’oh!
Did the survey too..
Oh man, that delish combo sounds pretty damn good right now. Sigh — PMS week and everything except the diet is sounding pretty good.
I’m loving the blog design. Reminds me I need to spend some time on mine (although you are mucho more talented).
I think that snack sounds delish! I’ll try it if the day ever comes when I actually have baking chips left over.
Have you ever had Nutella? The chocolate/hazelnut spread? It is so good on Ritz crackers and on Graham crackers.
I am completely guilty of the Diet Coke/Quarter Pounder Value Meal combo. I just like the taste of Diet Coke because that’s the only pop I drink. I know better than to think I’m saving any calories!
I love me a milky way and plain salty potato chips or even bbq….oh girl, you got me reeling now.
Oh yum, that sounds great! But I have no chocolate chips or crackers in the house.
Time for a new grocery list, and they’re both at the top of my list. Hey, junk food hacks are awesome!
1. Love the new look, especially the header.
2. I have done similar acts of desperation. You think you’re trailer parkish? As a child, we lived 15 miles outside of the nearest town of 200, so we had a desperation snack: crunched up saltines with pancake syrup. Salty, sweet, crispy…what more could a child want?
Love the new look. and I would totally use low fat crackers. Gotta get the low fat somewhere!
Um…YUM! Trailer Park, Schmailer Park! It’s chocolate and butterscotch and creamy melted goodness with the salty crunch providing the yin to that sweet, sweet yang.
Um. Perhaps I need to go have my own snack, since apparently I am hungry and now obsessing over yours. Or better yet, maybe I should just get some sleep.
I hardly buy junk food for the same reason. I can totally say “no” at the grocery store and leave the sweets on the shelf but as soon as they are in my house, I lose all self-control. But you know what I used to do if I was out of chocolate chips? I would make just the cookie dough part and eat that to fulfill my sweet craving. The texture of the batter and the creaminess of the butter and sugar…….mmmm, mmmm good. I’m a loser, I know.
How very creative of you to make up your own new dessert recipe!
I still have chocolate in the house from last weekend. Ugh. I’m starting to crave a big salad right about now.
Ok, now I want that but I lack the necessary ingredients…..I suppose I could melt down the 300 lbs. of the children’s Easter candy and spread it on Saltines…..
I like your new site. It looks clean.
I just posted about bizarre chocolate eating behaviour too! Your concotion doesn’t sound trashy at all, in fact it sounds fabulous.
mmm.
Dude, I’m out to buy Ritz Crackers faster that you can say two-ton Tilly.
I’m all about the white trash treats (WTT). I bet it would be good using saltines, too. When we were little we used to spread a bit of butter on a saltine and sprinkle it with confectioners sugar. Klassy.
I think you should call them izz’mores. You know, like s’mores with an Izzy twist.
and I do drink diet coke even with high-fat stuff because for me, it’s a taste issue. Sugar coke tastes like syrup to me, it’s way too much, so I prefer that lighter taste of diet. I”m not deluding myself about what i’m eating with it, though!
Really like the new look. Devilishly good!
That reminded me of the Kit Kat bars that my friend Amy’s mom would make with saltines. Great, now I’m drooling.
Mmmmm, that does sound good! As I sit here on my wide load, I can’t help but want some!
Damn! salty and sweet in one place, my favorite. Makes me want to pop a bag of pop corn and pour in a bag of m & m’s. mmmmm. I like the new 3 columns, if you want me to still ask my programmer about a template shoot me an email, but it looks like you pretty much rocked it out.
That sounds like something I would of eaten after smoking pot. Though icing straight from the tub was a favorite. Notice I said “would” and “was”. My pot smoking is past tense. I did the survey and I must like you because usually I avoid those things:)
I LOVE THIS NEW LOOK.
I Like it A Lot.
Love the new look! Also love pretzels and ice cream, so your chocoaty cracker things sound awesome.
*drool*
That sounds like a total stoner snack.
Gah! That sounds so f*cking good! My muffin top thanks you.
I’m lovin’ the new look. Your talent makes me jealous… in a good way.
What Jess said about the saltines with butter and sugar reminded me that we used to come home from school and spread soft butter on white bread and sprinkled it with white sugar. Mmmmm.
And could Jess R tell us how to make Kit Kats with saltines please?
Okay … thanks … now I am off to make that. Ooooooh yum
LOVE the new look.
i took the survey and NOT because you paid me too. cause well. you didn’t. selfish whore.
i will stalk you at blogher! lol
This is something I would do in a second and I don’t live in a trailer, but my mom does. And it’s nice dammit.
Unrelated to this post entirely, but to answer your question — the book is really, really good. I’m only about 9 chapters in and I had to force myself to stop reading last night and go to bed. Very, very good. I recommend it already.
That sounds insanely good.
Off to buy butterscotch chips…
Just a note to add to the general decadence of your blog.
Try the same thing, only first spread a little peanut butter on the Ritz. Works just as well with saltines.
I think we used to call them ’summores’ when I was a kid about a century ago.